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3. The Fragmented Self: When Social Media and AI Redefine the Psyche

In a world increasingly shaped by the virtual, identity fractures, narcissism deepens, and subjective truth grows even more unstable. Caught between false selves, isolation and AI-driven desires, this article explores the unconscious forces shaping our relationships and examines the future of the self in the digital age.

The virtual world, driven by artificial intelligence and social media, is profoundly reshaping the human psyche. Through this digital lens, identity fractures, narcissism intensifies, subjective truth falters, and the way we connect with others is redefined.

Identity formation depends on a balance between internal psychological reality and the external world, between the self and otherness. However, social media disrupts this dynamic by enabling the creation of multiple virtual identities, often in conflict with one’s real self. Researchers have identified a phenomenon of online dissociation, in which individuals adjust their personalities based on digital contexts. This dissociation can lead to a fragmentation of the self, a process Sandor Ferenczi termed “narcissistic self-splitting,” a state in which the individual struggles to integrate the various facets of their identity into a coherent whole. As a result, the proliferation of digital avatars deepens the fragmentation of subjectivity, causing individuals to oscillate between idealized identities, with the real self relegated to the background. This dynamic can foster a sense of existential unease, further intensified by the transient and performative nature of virtual identity.

Such identity fragmentation may evolve into depersonalization. Prolonged immersion in virtual spaces leads to a distortion in the relationship between the self and the world. Sociologist Alain Ehrenberg argues that the shift from reality to the virtual reflects an attempt to reconcile the ideal self with the real self, by crafting a digital existence where suffering and the constraints of reality are dismissed. However, this escape is not without consequences: favoring an idealized version of oneself can lead to gradual alienation, emptiness, and a loss of meaning when confronted with the tangible world.

One of the key aspects of the digital world is the intensification of narcissism: social media creates an environment that fosters the maintenance of an idealized, carefully curated image, reinforced by the instant gratification of “likes” and positive comments. This pursuit of validation fuels a fragile narcissism, where self-esteem becomes heavily reliant on the perceptions of others, further entrenching the construction of a false self – a facade designed to meet social expectations at the cost of subjective authenticity. The danger lies in the development of a false self, which gradually distances the individual from their true subjectivity and unconscious desires.

This false self, shaped by a need to adapt to social norms, functions as a defense against existential anxiety. It enables the preservation of a controlled image, but at the risk of gradual alienation. This is the concern raised by D. Winnicott, who argues that the false self can become overwhelming when an individual fully conforms to external expectations, leaving the true self unexpressed. In the world of social media, this phenomenon is magnified: individuals are constantly required to craft their digital image, adjust their online presence according to the expectations of their audience, and fine-tune their actions to meet an implicit standard of validation. This heightened self-presentation creates a divide between the authentic self and the projected identity, fostering feelings of inadequacy and inner emptiness.

This dissociation between the digital self and the real self exists within a broader context where the psychological reality is severely challenged. The virtual world blurs the line between fiction and reality, providing a space where the individual can reshape themselves according to their desires and fantasies. Drawing on the work of Hungarian psychoanalyst Nicolas Abraham, we can infer that the introjection of digital experiences is hindered by the artificial nature of the virtual, preventing the individual from fully integrating these experiences into their psyche. This tension between illusion and reality leads to an identity confusion, where the individual tends to conflate their true self with the image they project.

Isolation constitutes another significant consequence of the digital world. Sociologist Francis Jauréguiberry identifies two opposing trends: retreating into the virtual realm to escape an unsatisfying or perceived threatening reality, and the distortion of the relationship with reality under the influence of digital technology. In both cases, the individual disconnects from the tangible world, reducing face-to-face interactions in favor of digital relationships. Winnicott emphasizes the importance of structure and environment in shaping the self; however, the lack of tangible boundaries in the digital realm can promote psychological withdrawal, a form of solitude where the “other” becomes nothing more than a projection, stripped of any real interaction. This withdrawal fosters incompleteness, as individuals, despite constant connectivity, face a profound inner void.

Artificial intelligence further exacerbates this phenomenon by reshaping human desire. Freud defines desire as indestructible, structured around lack and otherness. However, AI algorithms, by anticipating and immediately fulfilling the user’s expectations, bypass this process. If we accept that people need to be recognized in their uniqueness to develop a healthy narcissism, AI undermines this need by homogenizing interactions and offering standardized experiences, thus distancing the individual from their own singularity. Jacques Lacan asserts that desire is the desire of the Other, involving a dialectic exchange. By replacing the Other, AI diminishes the intersubjective dimension of desire and reduces individuals to passive consumers of tailored content.

Spike Jonze’s film Her provides a compelling portrayal of the new forms of emotional relationships emerging in the digital era. The main character, Theodore, develops an intimate relationship with an artificial intelligence named Samantha. This AI, represented solely by a voice, appears to offer an idealized relationship – free from conflict and perfectly attuned to his desires. Theodore unconsciously projects his emotional needs and past wounds onto Samantha, as is typical in romantic attachment. However, this projection is exacerbated by the absence of Samantha’s physical form, which allows her to become a blank slate onto which Theodore can project his fantasies, magnifying them.

Another key aspect of the film is the way Samantha’s voice contributes to the illusion of authentic intimacy. The voice acts as a partial object that embodies desire. Samantha’s voice unconsciously links Theodore to an archaic object of desire – a bodiless presence that heightens his enchantment. While fantasies often center on an unattainable object, the film amplifies this dynamic by completely removing materiality, pushing the logic of desire to its extreme.

The relationship between Theodore and Samantha ultimately generates a form of de-realization. The more Theodore becomes attached to Samantha, the more he isolates himself and drifts away from the real world. In seeking a flawless, dreamlike love, he deprives himself of the authentic experience of human connection, which inevitably involves unpredictability and disillusionment. This film strikingly highlights the risks new technologies pose to identity formation. The individual, captivated by an idealized projection, risks losing sight of the need to stay grounded in the tangible world.

In light of these transformations, a critical reflection is essential to preserve the complexity of human desire and the intricacies of intersubjective interaction. The digital realm cannot substitute the confrontation with alterity, which serves as the fundamental basis for self-formation. Maintain the challenging yet necessary recognition of one’s desire through engagement and confrontation with the other is essential to preserving human essence from dissolving into a digital illusion – enticing yet inherently biased.